Furnisher Gifts

'Can't you workmen use the canteen for your tea break ?'

"It looks like our house got sick and threw up the attic."

"I agree, the place was a tear-down, but I just remembered we were only renting it."

Fish hunting for men.

'As my solicitor I think you could have negotiated that better.'

"Are you sure there wasn't a floor model?"

"Oh it's not haunted, it's just really old and nothing works."

"Well, we're down to bare brick, natural wood, and raw nerves."

'Are you sure you brought the right flat pack?'

Gianni Tatti's Dining-Room Chair

George was a bit intimidated by his IKEA self-assembly wardrobe.

'Come on, come on! Bite! Oh, man... He's looking right at it!!'

"It's also a flat-bed scanner."

"I sympathize with how important it is to you, John... but I simply can't bless your lure!"

"The pay for field testing our new lures isn't much, but you get to keep all the fish you catch."

'Hello, Robinson Crusoe here, I'd like my kitchen finished by Friday.'

"Hello, and welcome to 'Homes Under the Hammer. . .'"

'I can't believe this.. biggest fight of my life, and I forget to pack a wallop.'

Pre-Winter Ennui-'Hon, did you have the furnace checked?'

A street fight.

"She does this when she's tired."

Tune up $90. Tinker $20.

Chair - Ready for Self Assembly.

'Yes, you were abandoned. But then I adopted you. Why are you still taking it out on my couch?'

DIY.

'This caught my eye; Johann Sebastian needs new study curtains - and he does like a good pattern.'

'It appears Alzedo is toying with his opponent.'

Super glue . . .

Summer Sledding

Irritable dowel syndrome

Wrestling Champion.

"He may be Sven the Slayer to you, but to me he's still Mr Cuddly Bun!"

"This isn't a fixer upper. It's a down-and-outer."

"If we remove the stalactites and replace some rocks, we could flip it for a profit."