Funny Excuse Collector Pillows

Obedience School - 'My master ate my homework.'

"I was going to chuck it all and go to Paris but I didn't have enough frequent-flier miles."

'Why would anyone order a pint of stoat?'

"Of course, I'm perfectly willing to pay my income tax, but I stayed home all day on the fifteenth, and nobody came."

"I guess one of the bunnies was a boy after all!"

Homework flavored dog food

Student to math teacher: 'My dog ate my homework and got arithmetics.'

"I've put every one of those vital master copies through here, and it took ages. Where do the copies come out?"

"No, I don't think you 'new break shoes', I think you need new break feet. You are supposed to depress the brake pedal you know."

"I've been window-shopping..."

Bell Hop

'You always say you'll do things tomorrow. . . but you never do.'

A frog catches an insect truck.

"I figured by not doing my homework I'd lighten your workload by giving you one less paper to correct."

"I dictated my essay to my parrot. Unfortunately, my cat then ate my homework."

'An essay on what I did last summer? -- I was hoping to let all that stuff blow over.'

'Dad, is it true that before we had hard drive crashes, the dog used to eat your homework?'

'Can you stop giving me homework, Miss...My dog's putting on weight.'

"If it's still following me around at noon, you'll bet I'll eat it."

This smart phone comes with excuses for not keeping in touch with your mother.

'The dog ate my gnome-work.'

'The following video contains scenes of swearing and violence' - Family holiday

The dog that does the homework...

"Sorry I can't make it tonight, I'm busy organising my widgets."

Under new management. But still no bananas.

"I don't do well on standardized testing. I blame it on standardized tests."

"Should we agree on a safe word?"

"Sure, the cow jumped over the moon, and he also burned up on re-entry."

'I'm not allowed to have a dog, so I have to eat my own homework.'

'I'm not late. I didn't want to come in at all.'

'Why'd we deny your claim? I'll have to check our records.'

"For me, homework is more of a journey than a destination."

"I can't help my poor grades... I don't sit next to any smart kids to copy from!"