Funny Excuses Pillows

The dog that does the homework...

'Truth? I am just looking out the window...'

"I have to rest. The 'check engine' light on my activity tracker just came on."

"Of course, I'm perfectly willing to pay my income tax, but I stayed home all day on the fifteenth, and nobody came."

Homework flavored dog food

Student to math teacher: 'My dog ate my homework and got arithmetics.'

Procrastinator Hall of Fame

Pets are not only good companions, they're good excuses.

'The rain must have made our garage shrink...'

"I have to cancel our plans. I feel a headache coming on."

"My dog is a finicky eater. He refuses to eat my homework."

'You always say you'll do things tomorrow. . . but you never do.'

Assignments Due. The Russians hacked my homework.

"He's faking it to get out of school. Bring in his teacher and run some tests."

Great excuses No 964 'I was on my way to the gym when I was abducted by alliens from the planet Sanrg who took me to their ship and force fed me choc-chip ice cream.'

"I figured by not doing my homework I'd lighten your workload by giving you one less paper to correct."

'Can you stop giving me homework, Miss...My dog's putting on weight.'

'It's not my fault! My dad channel surfs constantly!'

'Jogging's too dangerous for me. I tried it once, and I rear-ended a mailman.'

This smart phone comes with excuses for not keeping in touch with your mother.

Homework: Bring Your Kitty To School. 'My dog ate my homework.'

'I'm very creative and creative people are not afraid to fail.'

"Sorry I can't make it tonight, I'm busy organising my widgets."

Kid about report card: 'I had technical problems.'

'I don't have any fish. . . Because I catch and release, yeah, that's it, catch and release!'

Reasons to avoid training no.236 - A leaf on the path.

Obedience School - 'My master ate my homework.'

"I don't do well on standardized testing. I blame it on standardized tests."

"My dog ate my homework."

'Is it my fault they didn't send me to obedience school?'

"Oh, come on, Mr. Waldner, you knew I was an angler when you hired me."

'I'm not late. I didn't want to come in at all.'

'The starving peasants ate my homework.'

'Sorry, I overwashed.'

'I'm not allowed to have a dog, so I have to eat my own homework.'