Funny Dog Tales Gifts

'Some watchdog you turned out to be!'

The Fourth Little Pig

"When I first arrived, Young Master was always with me and Old Master didn't want anything to do with me, nor it's the opposite: Go figure..."

Another reason Chihuahuas hate basketball.

Dog wearing a cone

"Wait, wait, back up, back up. Who the #!@! is George Orwell?"

Dog phrenology

'He tells me there's one chapter of his memoir titled, 'My Likeable Master'.'

'You're the watchdog. Do you honestly expect us to believe you didn't see anything?'

"The first thing we have to do is get you up there."

The hare and the tortoise - the rematch.

'Oh, and if a Farmer John calls, I'm not here.'

"Whoever said you can drive a horse to water, but you can't make him drink? (hiccup)

-'Do you have a last wish senor?' -'Yeah, I'd like to pee on your leg.'

I was allowed to chew this. But not that

'After the big race the tortoise and the hare are ordered to provide urine samples."

'That's the problem with Dacshunds, you can never tell whether they're coming or going.'

Cinderella's coach mice needed therapy for many years.

"Oh, man. Ha ha! The look on your face when that squirrel turned around and started chasing you!"

"You're not leaving until we know everything."

Aesop's Fables - Dog and His Own Reflection

If the mouse hole's a-rockin', don

"So the vet says, 'If this is my thermometer, then where's my pen?' . . . Get it!? . . . IS this thing on!?"

Hooked on fried sardines, Irene's cat leads them on a life of crime.

"I told him that whole elephants being afraid of us thing was just a myth. But did he listen? Now look at him. What a putz."

'Katherine, why can't he eat like the other dogs?'

"It's OK, but I thought an Xbox would be something I could climb into."

"I'm always afraid I'll come to just as I'm being flushed down the toilet."

It's a nice place to live, except for the nosy neighbors.

"I think my name is 'stop that' but I don't know for sure."

'I never thought I'd say this, but you're moving just a little too fast for me.'

'I won! I won!'

Noah's Ark: Economy/First Class

'Look at them both arguing about the race: Adults are so competitive...'

Doe-to-doe salesman,