Fun-loving Jokester Pillows

Pelobong

'Life size enlargements done here.' - 'Do my pictures of the pyramids please.'

"Of course they're permanent. I'm an artist."

"I saved us a hundred bucks on a Jolly Jumper."

'While you're 'fixing' my private parts, could you give me a loaner pair?'

'I hate to say I told you so, Larry, but that's why you check your car for bears before you put on your seatbelt.'

'I said 'barium,' not 'bury him'!'

A crab with a utility knife claw

"It's partly my fault he's been ignoring me lately. I'm the one who gave him the laser pointer."

'They said 'write what you know.' So I didn't write anything.'

"Okay, who's been messing with the copy machine?"

Drainpipe in a sombrero.

I think he's joking. "Placebo" can't be a real medical science term. It sounds like a funny name for a clown.

Men dancing

'When you said, Dream Team, I thought you meant the Swiss Bikini Team.'

Leaving cards.

Man on desert island using elastic to shoot him off the island.

"Nice try, Frank. Mother is still coming for the weekend."

'You're allowed to pick up the ball before it stops rolling, you know.'

"You idiots … we lost!"

Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep and with the sun if I've found death, please excuse my morning breath.

Lengray's 1,001 practical Jokes for beginners (a man getting punched in the face with a mechanical glove).

"Is there a humorist in the house?"

'But seriously, folks... Who knows how many blondes it takes to screw in my latest invention?'

'Okay Dad, time to unwind.'

"Your Covid-19 Test Results Are In..."

'Hey,mom-have you seen my pet frog?'

Dry Hard with a Vengeance

'The electricians hot-wired the building inspector's car seat again.'

'As I feared, the X-ray shows that you are crying inside.'

'Hello? Animal control?'

'Alan, it's the 11th hole, and that Tiger Woods mask isn't intimidating us...'

Unselfish by nature - he delights to show the novice where the big chub cruise...and where the best pike lie.

'... and I would have gotten away with it too, if it weren't for those dang meddling kids... that and my incredibly stupid plan. Also in retrospect, I realize my costume was, regrettably, quite lame.'

Interrupted Shower.