Frugal Funsters Gifts

"It isn't a romantic candle-lit dinner when you've had the electricity cut off."

'What do you do with the time you save?'

'You're close, Spencer, but usually a business plan is a little more involved!'

'Recent studies in primate colonies suggest that organizational performance can be improved by replacing complicated financial incentives with bananas.'

Thrift: have your arms and legs amputated, use a pillow for a bed!

"I can't imagine why we didn't think of this before."

'I love it when you say - 'I'm going to print money'.'

'Dave will only turn the heating on when he thinks it's absolutely necessary.'

10 Days Without an Interest Rate Change

"Times are perfect for us masochists!..."

Leopards do change their spots

"Goodbye cruel world."

'Don't panic, folks! It's red ink, not blood!

"This place has a water view if you're looking at the mortgage."

'The increased child tax credit is supposed to stimulate the economy...so how about a raise in my allowance?'

Ten business commandments, city trading floor

'That's much better.'

People often have us confused with investment bankers. We loot and plunder, leaving a mess wherever we go, and when there are complaints we claim endangered species status.

'I could only afford a Yo.'

Woman with blouse zipped up to varying degrees. Arrows read, 'single,' 'married, 'happily married.'

'Darn, all these coupons are expired. We could have saved 50 cents on 9 cans of dog food.' 'We don't have a dog.'

What's 'Bitcoin'?

'You must know my kids...they spend like there's no tomorrow.'

"He put the 'fun' in funding."

"I hate it when he makes snow angels in his bonus."

'I wonder if I can declare you as dependents on my income taxes?'

Investments: Still Open to New Investors - 'A fool & his money fund.'

"By now, you've probably noticed that around here, money talks and you-know-what walks!"

"For someone your age, the yearly premium on a $5,000 policy is $8,000."

"Armstrong, you're the cheapest cheapskate on earth." "Not yet, but a man can dream." "This toothache is killing me but I have no money and no insurance. Do you know where I can find a really cheap dentist?" "Of course. I can give you my guy's name. He works for peanuts." "I’ll get a pen." "You’ll also need a passport and lots of penicillin."

"Our firm doesn't have any money problems to speak of. Just lack of money problems."

"Thank you and feel free to download the appropriate holiday greeting from my website."

'The sun'll be up soon. Can I go downstairs now?'