Frontier Fun Gifts

"Buckled up for safety, Slim?"

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

"Go away, he's not done playing Cowboys and Indians yet."

NYer uploaded by mod - "Come look, hon! We just got a new cactus!"

'The pioneers opened the frontier, but it wasn't legal until brave lawyers blazed the paper trail!'

"You're right -- this town is big enough for the both of us."

'Ogg's quite the visionary.'

"It just don't feel right, drinking him like that."

Dniel Boone makes an involuntary fashion statement.

"I'm sleeping in today. I got in late from last night's orgy."

"But mom, he followed us home!"

1839: Rare photograph of wagons on the 'Organ Trail.'

I'm Ok, You're Ok Corral

House Hunters of the Old West

"You're gettin' too big for your dang britches."

Two cowboys fight using remote control cowboys

"As I recall from the last session, you were born in Tennessee and raised in the woods, so you knew every tree. Then something happened when you were only three. What was that?"

'Will that be brawling or non-brawling?' Brawl in saloon.

'Davy Crockett's divorce.'

"You were the one who wanted to colonize another planet."

'Good of you to rustle us up some fire wood, Bat.'

'These new bendy wagons will be handy when pulling em into a circle.'

Cowboy with hat out Title: 'Homeless on the Range'

"And my spittoon will go right about there."

"It's a big responsibility but I believe I can be both 'Joe six pack' and 'Joe six gun'."

"I only use it for self definition."

'Have you never seen a boom town before, stranger?'

"It would be good to settle in a place that has recreational facilities."

Scott of the Antarctic

High energy drinks

'Don't worry, our security system is impeccable.'

'Quiet Zone' in the desert.

'Stranger, we live in this climate because we're practicing for hell.'

"Would you mind closing the window please?"

'O tumbleweed, O tumbleweed, how lovely are your branches.'