Friendship Analyzer Gifts

Girl putting her toys in groups

"I decided to treat my employees like friends...now I hate all of them!"

"As a friend, I pray you rest in peace. As a dog, I really want to dig you up."

"How to talk to people" "Make them rue the day"

"Even though I wasn't always perfect, I feel deep down that I am now."

'As a token of friendship we present to you this sacred albino fawn.' 'We sailed all the way across the Atlantic Ocean, and all you have is light deer?!'

"The first day of school. Yes sir. A day to make new friends. A day to mark new beginnings. A day to discover everyone but you has grown three feet over the summer."

And when we came home, the entire anthill was gone... It was awful, Mom - but at least Harry and I still have each other...

'Ted, isn't it about time you sorted out your deer-gut?'

'Listen, Geoffrey ...I know you're a clinical psychologist, but I DON'T have A.D.D. ! You're just incredibly boring.'

"You're not at all like your answering machine."

Intelligent Sexual Design

"Hi Ginny, that's a nice new haircut you've got there. Are you trying to be cuter than me?"

"I hate to break it to you, but you weren't his best friend."

"...as they may share in our joy.", "For we are all as one."

"Finally, it's Spring! I missed you! Let's go and play!"

"Juicy worms?! Oh yes, they're my favourites too..."

'Hey, scratch my back and I'll scratch your back.'

'Of course I love her - but I'm not in love with her.'

'You haven't changed a bit Perkins.'

"I wouldn’t go so far as to call Darren here an ‘imaginary friend’—he’s more of an imaginary acquaintance."

"Look, I know Estella has a boyfriend. I would never try to break them up. But it's not illegal to text friends...and we're still friends..."

"I can't see it lasting!"

"You seem calm above the surface, but underneath I feel as if you're paddling like hell away from me."

"Arrows won't work on him. Use a taser."

'You guys are real friends!'

Facebook 33 A.D.

McHappy

Look...a friendly face.

"What do you mean, you didn't know I wanted a divorce? Don't you follow me on social media?"

'My wife ran off with my best friend...I really miss him.'

'Come on, I did it for you...'

"I heard it and you know it! You were purring when the puppy was playing with you and licking your face!"

"Alpha Male."

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