Online Friendship Analyst Gifts

I think I know which one of my Facebook friends unfriended me. How did you figure it out? I only had two friends to being with.

"How to talk to people" "Make them rue the day"

"Even though I wasn't always perfect, I feel deep down that I am now."

"I decided to treat my employees like friends...now I hate all of them!"

Intelligent Sexual Design

"I hate to break it to you, but you weren't his best friend."

"...as they may share in our joy.", "For we are all as one."

'Of course I love her - but I'm not in love with her.'

"Juicy worms?! Oh yes, they're my favourites too..."

"You seem calm above the surface, but underneath I feel as if you're paddling like hell away from me."

"I wouldn’t go so far as to call Darren here an ‘imaginary friend’—he’s more of an imaginary acquaintance."

"Arrows won't work on him. Use a taser."

Facebook 33 A.D.

Look...a friendly face.

Weapons of Mass Comparison

"What do you mean, you didn't know I wanted a divorce? Don't you follow me on social media?"

'My wife ran off with my best friend...I really miss him.'

'Looks like I was wrong. Apparently I can have more loathing for this era...'

"Alpha Male."

Kiss me quik dating service

'To be honest, the only reason I don't leave her is because she takes my penalty points on her licence.'

'Ah, Mr. Collins? We are friends on Facebook, but I can't remember why.'

"I operate under the assumption that man is basically good."

'English you say? Well then, me being a Scottie, shall we have a go at being friends?'

'Oh you know, the usual - Mice, rats... the occasional disloyal friend.'

"Listen, I like you and I like hanging out with you, but I'm getting more and more concerned about how your dad is looking at me..."

No more neurotic people in my life, but will I be bored

Man Locked in a Heart

"Yeah, it's disappointing, but my mum also says we're not related: We can still be BFF though..."

Girl putting her toys in groups

"Of course if you miss a payment the friendship ceases."

"Of course we still like you, Mark, but Joey has more friends on social media!"

"Good God. My wife and my best friend."

'It is time. Let us begin the painstaking process of building our cocoons.'

'It's great having thousands of Facebook Friends, but I hadn't expected they'd all come for a visit at the same time!'