Fortune Cookie Fans Pillows

The day the dinosaurs died...'There's no fortunes in any of these!'

"You must be cheating - no one's that lucky!"

'Dial 1-900-Fortune.'

'So,,,apparently you're really a dude,'

A cow goes to the Fortune Teller - 'I can see two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions, on a sesame seed bun...!'

Fortune cookies based on various business magazines.

'Our businessman's special includes fortune cookies filled with stock tips'

Lottery - come back to eat here 20 times and you will win million dollar in lottery.

"Your moon is in the House of Pancakes."

'Well, they're just like your mom's cookies if your mom is a 35 ton, multi-unit dough extruder.'

'My crystal ball is in the shop. Pick a fortune cookie.'

Mine says, 'Blaming China won't work.'

'Congratulations! You've just won ten million dollars!'

Your Palm

'It says I forgot my wallet.'

"He's a widowed eighty-year-old billionaire with a 'Do Not Resuscitate' tattoo...what's not to like?"

'My fortune says you're a liar, so I won't even ask what yours says.'

Chinese Novel Cookie

"Either the fortune cookie cutter failed, or you have a lot of issues you're not telling your mother about."

'This fortune cookie says, 'You will have good luck investing in emerging markets, fortune cookie & Chopstick Trading Company of Singapore.''

"In an effort to avoid controversy, and to accommodate our attention spans, we will be replacing the commencement speaker with fortune cookies."

'That's weird. All this fortune cookie says is 'look out!''

'I'm a fortune teller Phillip. Music is going to mark a key moment in your life.'

Misfortune cookies

'See many bathroom breaks in near future after eating Moo Goo Gai Pan.'

"Let me get this straight - You're divorcing him because of a fortune cookie message?"

"I don't care how much I own – there's still something unsatisfying about digital Girl Scout Thin Mints."

Change in imminent

'Good news! The stock market is about to explode upwards on . . .'

"The wealth inequality is a good lesson, since a bullish portfolio will make you rich, not happy."

Chinese Cuisine. I think that hedge fund manager misplaced his after-meal cookie. That would be the second fortune he lost.

'Okay, mine says, 'Eat healthier foods. The current health care system really sucks.''

"It says. . . 'That wasn't chicken.'"

"By opening this cookie you are agreeing to whatever terms..."

'Yahoo! It says 'Your wife is going to collect a large sum of insurance money!''