Foodie Family Gifts

'I have to be very careful when I eat...my Mother sneaks carrots into everything.'

Oh, Wow! With all this baby food flying around, I can't wait until he starts eating steak!!!

Hungry child

'Hush puppies? Who named these things?'

Kids Eat Free

"She brings me my food. I call her MomDash."

'I sent out for everything.'

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"Boil, toil and trouble, I wish I'd never started this risotto."

"My emotional support dog ate my comfort food."

'I'll have the crab cake, and he'll have the crabby cake.'

"I'd like the garden salad with the blue cheese dressing, and my mother would like me married by age thirty."

"And the cheese in your omelette? Cheddar, Brie, aged Gouda, Morbier, Torta del Casar, Double Gloucester, Époisses, Shropshire blue, or American?"

Every barbecue has its winners and losers.

Ice Cream Surgeon

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

"When I was your age. I was really smelly."

"You do like octopus?"

What the Doctor Ordered

"Even the waiters here are organic."

I'm looking for a man who can meet my needs - Cream meringue master-chef.

'Oh man I've got a splitting headache.'

Cow's Last Will and Testament.

'‘Because I said so' or ‘Just wait until you have kids of your own' section?'

'My diet's good...I'm two weeks ahead of schedule.'

La Table

Fast food. Even faster food

Newton discovers gravity and apple sauce in the same day.

"Easy for you to say - you're cured!"

'On the contrary... I'm too tough for the steak!'

Cut out and keep your own Christmas Caterer.

Two books: 'The Joy of Cooking' next to 'The Joy of Dieting'.

'He made an excellent jelly.'

"Rump roast?"

"To paraprase Nietzsche, there is no pleasure with out pain au chocolat."