Food Safety Pillows

'I'll have the vegetarian option please.'

"I just finished my on-line food safety course!"

'What'll it be - one large risk or several small ones?'

'This will make the consumers think differently about our bacteria problem,'

Nobody told James that the five second rule didn't apply in their line of work,

'Fish has mercury, meat has e-coli, veggies have pesticides, desserts cause obesity...so we'll have the health-concious nothing for dinner' special.'

Remember when I wanted to talk risk management, but all you wanted to talk was video games.

"Tonight's specials include beef wellington (long regarded as a major source of cholesterol and saturated fat), Cajun-style swordfish (suspected of containing PCBs and toxic metals), and chicken teriyaki (recent increase in the incidence of salmonella whi

'There's an inspector here from the Board of Health who would like to see the chicken soup.'

Health and safety at work.

'The health department will be here any minute. Get rid of all the salmonella back there.'

'The Health and Safety guy doesn't look very happy...I hope we're not gonig to fail the inspection.'

"I'll have the Catch of the Day."

'Would you like a piece of advice, Mr Salmonella?' asks passer-by to gentleman opening a deli.

'The FDA has found that food causes cancer. They're going to outlaw food!'

"Do you want a clean one?"

'According to these latest tests, anything can cause anything.'

'Caution: raw eggs!'

Grim Reaper with ChipsFries.

"Having consumed them for years, I can assure you, my company's GMO food products are perfectly safe."

'Are these mushrooms edible?'

'We're really sorry!'

'I think we're telling them more than we have to.'

Grocery Store - Warning: Contents may be hazardous to your health

'Why on Earth would you ask if this turkey is genetically modified?'

I'm here about the inspecting

"Dave, remember when you said you were hungry enough to eat a horse?"

'Don't worry- mine is the good E. Coli.'

Genetically Altered Salmon (and other foods) Research

'Sorry Ma'am....but your husband has been recalled!'

Cook for 3 minutes stir, wait 30 years to discover if the contaminated ingredient gives you stomach cancer.

'Confound it - somebody put tuna in our mercury.'

"Are there any nuts in the kitchen?"

'Is everything satisfactory, madam?'

'There was a what in your soup?'