Food Safety Enthusiast Pillows

'There's an inspector here from the Board of Health who would like to see the chicken soup.'

'What's the catch of the day?' 'Hepatitis!'

'The FDA has found that food causes cancer. They're going to outlaw food!'

"Are there any reports of illness at this table?"

'Sorry Ma'am....but your husband has been recalled!'

The FDA studies 'Tobacco'.

'You want the chili? - Have you had all your shots?'

'Considering time, temperature, and your lack of health insurance, I wouldn't eat the deviled eggs.'

'Don't look a gift horse in the mouth.'

'Don't worry it's organic...'

"...I dunno. He just bolted when you said you fancied lasagne for dinner."

"I don't get it, Mr. Johnson... the customers just aren't trying the stuff!"

"I wondered how long it would be before they came to that conclusion."

"I still call it a custard tart but to be honest, it's a dairy free, soy fructose mix, with no nuts."

"There's a free pudding for whoever finds the Chef's glass eye."

"According to its DNA, your meatloaf is from an unknown species."

Bacteria in junk food

"Is this menu recycled?"

"Waiter! There's something in my soup!"

"...And how much overweight were those mice?"

Food Uncertainty

"Honey! There's a recall on humans again!"

"I used to worry that I might get sick from contaminated food but I came up with a great solution. I've stopped eating."

Egg Scare - You're trying to kill me, aren't you?

'That your mushrooms aren't poisonous is your Valentine's gift.'

'Something moved!'

'I know I said that I didn't mind eating left-overs, dear. But I thought you meant yesterday's, not last week's!'

Wong's Chinese Restaurant notice: 'Oour fortune cookies are made in a facility that also processes litchi nuts.'

'The kitchen temperature is too high, couldn't you serve the steak chilled?'

'This is Martin from the Food Standards Agency...he'll be responsible for your meal tonight!'

'I'm amazed they had ANY meat in them.'

Scientific and Nervous Visitor.

"Here comes your tomato surprise, sir!"

An exterminator waits in line at a restaurant

"Uncle Tod's Reviews"