Food Perfectionist T-Shirts

"I don't like his color."

"This alphabet soup is in Times New Roman. I ordered Segoe Script! May I please speak to the chef?"

You're the puff in my pastry!

Picking pastries.

Under pressure.

Baking

"To paraphrase Nietzsche, there is no pleasure without pain au chocolat."

'Six different chefs in six months and they still can't make a decent broth!'

"I've been listening to your podcast. And though I agree with your opinion on deforestation and global warming, I strongly disagree with your claim that I overcook my pasta."

'I don't know how much more of this I can take!'

Cookery Lesson.

Papa's Pizza delivered in under 30 minutes.

'Oh, sure, it gets the creative juices going, but is it worth the cost?'

"I think she marked yours in blue pen because she used up all her red on mine."

"And not only do I make my own pizza sauce, I have a special way of crushing the tomatoes!"

"How much longer on your visionary gnocchi, Stefano?"

Staycation Photos

'I told you I only cook with my mother's Italian spices. She just left Naples and should be here with them in about eight hours.'

'They send you into the ketchup department? HA! I'M going into pizza!'

'this is the only place where no one is fooling around with the genes.'

Bread maker, coffee maker, tea maker, pasta maker.

"We'd like bruschetta, and we'd like it pronounced correctly."

'Mine was stone cold.'

American Pastry

Food Pyramid

"Being happy with one's work is the kiss of death."

I Bake. Deal with it.

Come dine with me!

"Don't you just love it when they lick the plates?"

"We got a report that you're rolling in dough."

"And that's when I realized that I much preferred making frothy desserts."

Here's one I made earlier.

Nancy had written more pages, but Andrew had stacked his more neatly.

'Coming to you direct from table nine; 'the polenta is cold'.'

"At what point did my Boeuf Bourguignonne become a pejorative beef stew?"