Pasta Perfectionist T-Shirts

"Hey, Mama!! Step it up!!!"

"I've been listening to your podcast. And though I agree with your opinion on deforestation and global warming, I strongly disagree with your claim that I overcook my pasta."

Under pressure.

"How much longer on your visionary gnocchi, Stefano?"

"No, that one's my pasta machine."

"Al dente!"

"I try not to be picky, but this meal is a bit too sticky!"

All I can say is, thank goodness for nametags. Penne. Bowtie. Ziti. Fettuccini. Rotini. Campanelle.

Food Pyramid

Bread maker, coffee maker, tea maker, pasta maker.

The Men From The Pasta Squad Know Their Stuff.

"He's a bit OCD with his spaghetti."

"Thanks for having us. And you, Carol, be sure to Google ‘common mistakes cooking pasta.’"

Antonio Carluccio.

Man complaining about a a knot in his spaghetti

Tagliatelle

"Wait, I think I found it!"

"Sufferin' sagebrush, Cookie! You call this pasta 'Al Dente?!"

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

You're the puff in my pastry!

Picking pastries.

"When portions are this huge, I eat half now and the rest in a few minutes."

Italia tours

Baking

'Another neat trick is to cut regular spaghetti into little pieces, and next thing you know you've got yourself a bowl of spaghetti-i-s.'

"To paraphrase Nietzsche, there is no pleasure without pain au chocolat."

'Six different chefs in six months and they still can't make a decent broth!'

"No, it's still just a thirst for spaghettios."

You'll be a manicotti soon enough, son - Just enjoy being a mostaccioli while it lasts.

Doctor's Office. He put me on a pasta diet -- He says I've been off my noodle long enough.

Old Phones Lasagne

'I don't know how much more of this I can take!'

"This alphabet soup is in Times New Roman. I ordered Segoe Script! May I please speak to the chef?"

Cookery Lesson.

'Do you call this spaghetti'