Food Irony Fan Pillows

Organic foods stand manned by stallholder using fly spray.

Filet minion

'Nowadays we want all our food to be ethically sourced, Personally I'd be happy if it was all chocolated sauced,'

"Do you want to be vaguely dissatisfied with Italian or Korean?"

Fly Tastings: 'Notice that hint of dog fur and then let that full bodied garbage finish unfold.'

Cambridge dons eat a banquet outside to prove they only get one chicken each.

Vegetables VS Junk Food.

Free Range Chickens

Waiter indicates cutlery for diner's tiny meal, saying: 'The one on the right is your mangnifying glass, sir.'

"Man does not live by chips alone. There's also guacamole."

'I thought a perfect martini would cover the 'well balanced' requirement of my night to cook.'

'Good news - we're merging with Mellman's Jelly and Alpine Toast.'

Milk Toast: One of the World's Most Deadly Foods!

'He's cured.'

Shrimp cook

"The other waiters just spit in the food of rude customers, not in their faces!"

'So this is a kitchen!'

'I'm afraid I'll have to get rid of you Simpkins. You're not good for business.'

Seminar on Obesity in the Workplace.

'I never see the dog complain about my cooking.'

'This is quite common. You've eaten so many sausages that you've turned into one.'

'Spaghetti dinner. Hold the garlic bread.'

'Look, I didn't know they had salad bars on these flights...'

"Are you gonna eat that garlic bread?"

'I spent the afternoon over a $500 lunch explaining how bad business is.'

"They're quite fatty, so to relieve your guilt I made sure they taste terrible."

"I miss my mom's home-cooked methamphetamine."

'Upsize your children' - 20 to 25 % of children are obese.

'Perfect with fish?' ... That's sick!'

'If you haven't got a low fat, organic, calorie free, ethically produced, free range option... I'll have the double chocolate cheesecake.'

Mad cow disease spreads to other ranches

Rice Cakes Gone Wild

"I asked for cosmetics but I got ultra-processed foods."

"The jelly required a soupçon more texture on the custard was on the wrong side of sweet."

'Waiter, there's a rabbit in my salad!'