Food Hygiene Fanatic Pillows

"Sorry it took so long. I'm the only one without hepatitis."

Counting ribs

'Why, of course I remember our first date -- I had filet mignon, potatoes au gratin, sauteed....'

'Before you see any patients have you completed your hand sterilisation and soap management course?'

"I forgot to take a pic of the tacos."

Honest Vending

CAUTION: Creative genius at work

"Instead of taking a bath can I wear a flea collar?"

"Nice try, Mom, but I'm going to go with a caterer."

'Waiter, there's a hairball in my soup, too.'

"Please don't kill me."

"Out with the old fish, in with the new."

Chef copy robot

No Cavity Club/No New Gum Receding Club

'Don't worry it's organic...'

Wash your hands

'Did you use mouthwash this morning?'

'Fish has mercury, meat has e-coli, veggies have pesticides, desserts cause obesity...so we'll have the health-concious nothing for dinner' special.'

A convenient attack of swine flu...

"I was wrong. Apparently, it wasn't our kids who used all my bubble bath."

'...and now, Doctor, if you have satisfactorily disinfected your hands,...

The FDA studies 'Tobacco'.

"I'm guessing you're a germaphobe?"

Hand Sanitiser on the Bar

Soap Versus Coronavirus

'I'm about to die and now I realise I have REALLY BAD breath!'

'Would you like me to wipe the cup with my finger or would you prefer Rover here licking it clean?'

"Relax, Dad... I'll put your toothbrush away when I'm done. I always do."

A genetically-modified,hydroponically-grown tomato conducts a taste-test of its own.

'Real hungry? Should be, 'Really hungry.' Adjectives take adverbs.'

The glass is half full. - '' - 'The glass is half empty' - '' - 'Gah!! No clean glasses!!' - '' -

'Mom, why do I have to wash both hands? I only eat with one of them.'

"Did you manage to pass the buck on our dodgy food?"

Shaking hands will transfer bacteria