Food Hygiene Enthusiast Pillows

"I see food hygiene isn't an issue with you guys."

Bigfoot is cooking food with a large hair net.

'The health dept. takes a great leap forward.'

"Well, Carmen, you didn't serve chicken to a vegetarian after all. Turns out his friend put this piece of rubber in his salad as a joke."

"The best way, son, is to bury your bones in airtight containers: it will keep them clean and fresh..."

'Before you see any patients have you completed your hand sterilisation and soap management course?'

Honest Vending

"Instead of taking a bath can I wear a flea collar?"

"Out with the old fish, in with the new."

No Cavity Club/No New Gum Receding Club

'Waiter, there's a hairball in my soup, too.'

"Please don't kill me."

Chef copy robot

Wash your hands

'Did you use mouthwash this morning?'

'Don't worry it's organic...'

'Fish has mercury, meat has e-coli, veggies have pesticides, desserts cause obesity...so we'll have the health-concious nothing for dinner' special.'

'...and now, Doctor, if you have satisfactorily disinfected your hands,...

The FDA studies 'Tobacco'.

"Relax, Dad... I'll put your toothbrush away when I'm done. I always do."

Soap Versus Coronavirus

"I'm guessing you're a germaphobe?"

'I'm about to die and now I realise I have REALLY BAD breath!'

Hand Sanitiser on the Bar

'Would you like me to wipe the cup with my finger or would you prefer Rover here licking it clean?'

A genetically-modified,hydroponically-grown tomato conducts a taste-test of its own.

"Maybe a little inconvenient, but not a single case of the flu in the entire office."

'Mom, why do I have to wash both hands? I only eat with one of them.'

"Did you manage to pass the buck on our dodgy food?"

"Uncle Tod's Reviews"

'Waiter, there's a bank in the soup.'

'Use by June 2007. Gah' - 'Use by July 2007. Double gah.' - 'Best of a bad bunch...'

"We can serve a rare handburger, but because of health regulations, this room will have to be heated to 160 degrees."

'Glass of hot water please, I want to wash the cutlery'

Shaking hands will transfer bacteria