Hand Hygiene Enthusiast Pillows

Misplaced smugness: When you think you're the only one at the party who's thought to use the back of the hand towel.

Please Don't Wash Your Hands While Driving

Wash hands and wear masks

Man sees sign as he exits bathroom: 'Employees Often Wash Hands'.

'Before you see any patients have you completed your hand sterilisation and soap management course?'

Whack-a-molecule

"Instead of taking a bath can I wear a flea collar?"

No Cavity Club/No New Gum Receding Club

"Out with the old fish, in with the new."

Hand sanitizer

Wash your hands

'Did you use mouthwash this morning?'

'...and now, Doctor, if you have satisfactorily disinfected your hands,...

Soap Versus Coronavirus

'Would you like me to wipe the cup with my finger or would you prefer Rover here licking it clean?'

"Relax, Dad... I'll put your toothbrush away when I'm done. I always do."

'I'm about to die and now I realise I have REALLY BAD breath!'

Hand Sanitiser on the Bar

"I'm guessing you're a germaphobe?"

'Mom, why do I have to wash both hands? I only eat with one of them.'

"Maybe a little inconvenient, but not a single case of the flu in the entire office."

A day in the life of a dish sink

Criminal Germs

Shaking hands will transfer bacteria

'I don't like the mediciney taste of this mouthwash either. I hate that taste of eyes of newt and turtle brains first thing in the morning.'

Things you forgot to tell me about getting older: "You're going to need bigger tooth floss."

'You've kept your shoes and socks on. I washed my feet yesterday.'

'You're not supposed to use 'dental floss' on dentures!'

"Did you wash your hands?"

"No, I'm not able to transplant your computer's antivirus software into your body. Try washing your hands more often."

'Are you sure you washed this salad?'

'I'm the good witch, and this is my house - made entirely out of dental care products.'

'Most of the dental floss gets thrown out on used. No wonder I'm always broke.'

'I already had one bath today! You want my skin to wear out?'

Grassy breath?