Food Funny-bone Tickler Gifts

'We don't have any seafood, sir, but I could soak some pork in salt water for you.'

Their marriage in jeopardy, Strawberry Shortcake and Billy Bob Banana Bread seek therapy.

Concert Pianist.

"Hello coastguard, it's my husband, he's beached"

Piano Recital

"Just because we're hyenas doesn't mean we always have to get Laughing Cow cheese."

The British Territory of the South Sandwich Islands.

'My Pilot-Fish is on holidays, so I'm using a GPS System to find my way around...'

'What's wrong with me, Doctor?' 'I have no idea! That information comes within doctor-patient confidentiality.'

'You realize, of course, there's a seven-day waiting period.'

'How could you flunk stone shop?'

A Club Sandwitch.

"So when my dad said I couldn't have a dog..."

"Dear, did something happen at the office?"

"Hurry, stop him!" (Dog running off with bone from man's x-ray).

Feline Stand Up - 'Fetching...how dumb is that? And another thing I don't understand...what's with all that TAIL WAGGING?'

'I've never known a dog who gets tired so quickly.'

"Eventually the instrument becomes an extension of your body."

'I'll sure be glad when somebody invents cable!'

"I'm the Class Clown fish."

'I did my research paper on Bart Simpson!'

'He's fine, it's only man flu not swine flu.'

Nerdy man wagging his finger.

Turkey to human dictionary - 'Quiet!!! You don't realize what you're saying!'

Will eat your homework for $.

Good Cop, Annoying Kid.

'They've made this 3D football really realistic, it even chucks coins at you.'

'And then as the young rat turned around, he realized he was in the junior high, block one dissection class!'

Cut out and keep your own Gardener!

"She's losing a lot of cream cheese. We're going to have to cut her open."

"Call me!"

Excess Baggage: Some folks believe that calories consumed during vacation do not count against your diet.

"You've got night fever."

Can I go to the Computer Tennis Camp?

Guru. It's not some kind of zen metaphor --- I really do have an invisible fence!