Food And Drink Experimentation Pillows

Unfortunately, Michael's 'wine straw' invention never really caught on.

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

'Enjoy your meal! We grow everything ourselves!'

Careful, the plate's probably still hot.

'We can order Lebanese, Thai, Italian, Indian, Greek or Chinese...'

"I read somewhere that truffles are a gateway fungus."

"Dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, onion bagel with Nutella and cream cheese, dirt, dirt, dirt..."

Before/After

"I hope you won't repent afterwards, Vicar, It's a devilishly hot vindaloo!"

"I'm afraid it's not cheese, it's 'cheese-like'."

Culinary Breakthroughs During Social Distancing

"Being vegan or vegetarian isn't enough anymore. From now on I will only cook stuff I stepped in on the sidewalk."

Ten out of ten for effort...

Junior Masterchef - "Darren Smith and I'll be cooking chicken nuggets with Mars bars in a CocaCola sauce"

'No creamed peas for me today!'

The Inexperienced Cook

"You're really not too extreme, huh?"

Acme Foods. Research and Development. Then it's an "no" on the Mexican Jumping Bean Dip?

Tzatzikicicle

'Wait, wait, before you mix them, you have to say, 'Pow!'.'

"You sure you don't want any Pi?"

Funky Chef 2

"Young man, the world is your oyster, but for God�s sake avoid peanuts, soy, milk, eggs, wheat, fish, tree nuts, and chocolate."

"I just found a lacto-vegan restaurant and Janet from accounts says she's FRUITAIAN!"

When placed in the hands of the right person on a long vacation, even egg salad could be a deadly weapon.

"It's a recipe from the 'Anti-Christ' cookbook."

Pizza with 'Made in China' imprinted on it.

"You know they're trying too hard when the chef's special is Corn Dogs Bordelaise."

"Just remember...the main ingredient in all my dishes is love."

"Honey, quick – the demi-glace is about to simmer – pass me a shot of Don Julio 1942 tequila!"

Roadkill Restaurant

'What the devil is that?

Guy Fieri

One reason secret family recipes are usually best kept secret.

'Continue gently simmering for ten minutes...'