Flooring Gifts

'Ooh, hey...real hardwood floors!'

"Do you prefer the tile engineered to look like wood, or the wood engineered to look like tile?"

"You were right, dear, slippers, shiny floor and a grouting gun don't mix."

'I just finished the floors, so they better stay clean!'

"No monsters, but there's a tear in the carpeting and I see hardwood!"

'OK, the worn out carpeting proves I snack too much. Only one thing to do. Tomorrow I get prices on hardwood floors.'

'Hello, Acme Termite Control...?'

Bunny Hop Hug

"The hardest thing about learning to tumble is the floor."

"I've decided to replace the sod floor with tile."

"We're thinking Shag Carpet. I'm tired of hardwood floors."

"I've been researching a little furniture company that I'd like to rearrange."

'That was some varnish remover!'

Santa checking out sleigh beds.

Fissure waxing - Department of Seismology.

Coming home to an empty apartment made him realize just how much he needed stuff.

Young Roger Penrose: 'Dad, I want to become a floor tiler.'

'Hello, high gloss floor wax - I'd like customer service. Yeah - I would like to report a problem!'

Floor manager.

"Well I've done the floor! Only two days hard graft, but I thought you said the apartment had a sea view..."

"Don't get the wrong idea, but I think I should tell you that all my furnishings are from Ikea."

The corporate merger of Plushy's Carpeting and Sticky's Velcro was not a success.

'Carpets' 'Try before you buy'

'You've got to give her points for originality.'

"That's my idea of an open floor plan office."

'I'd better not come in: My shoes could damage your brand new wooden floor...'

Carpets and truckpets.

'I tell you what, it's much more comfortable with a cushion...'

I just had a lovely dream - the world was done over in wall-to-wall carpeting.

'Wipe all your feet!'

"i told you hardwood floors were a big mistake."

"Please untangle us. Play a tango."