Flood Comedy Lover Gifts

"Either the house was built on a flood plain..."

'Luxury cruise you said!'

Captain steering house through flood.

"Well, we could just tell everyone we have an indoor pool!"

High tide.

"I told you not to hold your breath when comping up!"

'What do they mean 'is borer a beast of the field'?'

'Edward de Vere? -- give me a break!'

'A feasibility study has been ordered into a High Speed Submarine link between London and Birmingham.'

"What's a nice plaice like you, doing in a girl like this...?"

Hmmm

"Look! They're closing the doors! Hurry! I promise we're not going to the vet!"

'If you remember, the last thing I said before the ship went down was, 'don't forget to bring the ball'.'

"You know a lot about global warming. When will we be able to swim up central park west?"

'Bernie, sell my insurance stocks! Buy boat companies!'

"...and I want you to limit yourself to 3 feeding frenzies a day."

High Load

'Frankly, you look more dumb than cool, and you can't even light the darn thing!'

'I hate the monsoon season!'

'Say, isn't that our goldfish?'

Climate Change Winner

"Can I call you back? I'm going down with the ship."

"It's not polite to point."

'Don't call a plumber just yet. It's been a long winter and I'd like to get a little diving in.'

Warning - Earthquake coming!

"Oh boy, if the kitchen keeps on flooding, we might be able to escape!"

"I still say climate change is a hoax."

Letters arrive during flood.

"Mum. Can I have my rubber duck and my scale model of York please?"

'I suggest you take this policy. It even covers floods.'