Fitness Fanatic Turned Philosopher Gifts

"Good game."

"I work out in preparation for being out of shape for the next 30 years."

Critisize your weight.

"I've had a lot of exercise today! I jumped to several conclusions, ran my mouth on the phone, and I just cycled through 500 cable channels!"

"Smoke a cigar that fits your face."

An old man exercising with hourglasses

'Actually, I do mind wearing your pedometer!'

Guy in gym

"My blood type...it's the type that doesn't like to exercise."

And this model comes with a fitness tracker.

Pelobong

T-shirt reads: 'No Pain, No Pain.'

"When did everybody stop jogging?"

'His idea of healthy living is going to the pub in his tracksuit.'

'Doc, I'd like you to meet my personal trainer. This should explain a lot about my medical situation!'

"My body is a temple... unfortunately it's in ruins"

'On my new diet I can eat anything I want, but have to walk 500 miles a day.'

"Up here everything is pretty much opposite."

'It's just a recliner with built-in heart rate monitor. But look at how many big inflatable balls are sold as exercise equipment.'

Exercise Car.

'Flipping the remote and clicking the mouse are his low-impact aerobics.'

"Wanna go scroll on our phones at the gym?"

"How much does it cost to buy a membership then never use it?"

'if your wife ever asks you to meet her at Pilates...don't! It's not a pizzeria.'

"Being cremated is my last hope for a smoking hot body. . ."

"My New Year's resolution is to get fit and watch more TV."

'Executive Fitness Plan'

"We gave every employee the latest fitness tracker wristband. It helps them keep tabs on our 35-step-per-day limit."

'Maybe I've got washboard abs underneath - you ever think that?'

'Seems like we're all too old, unfit, overweight. . .'