Fitness Enthusiast With A Lazy Day Pillows

'This is my favorite machine in the gym.'

Police Feline Unit

"A retired superhero's re-purposed utility belt"

Lazy Octopus

"Really? They're now giving out non-participation trophies?"

Cat and mouse

Bill and Lester have a 'Hay Day'.

Catatonic

"When was the last time you exercised something other than a purchase option?"

'Some dogs are meant to be working dogs and some aren't.'

To be honest, I'd just as soon as lay in the yard, but he so looks forward to it.

"Would you get me a beer from the refrigerator? Just grab one of the cans on the top shelf. Come on, I do so much for you—all these years, the walks, the food, the chases... Come on! Never mind."

'The stage hypnotist was great, he regressed Jeff to a previous life, and discovered that he was a layabout then, too.'

'Just look at him. The face that lunched on a thousand chips.'

'I've never known a dog who gets tired so quickly.'

"C'mon, you can do this! Be the sock!"

'The great thing about sloth is you can't be blackmailed for it.'

'Can you mow the lawn? The kids can't find their trampoline.'

"I've had a lot of exercise today! I jumped to several conclusions, ran my mouth on the phone, and I just cycled through 500 cable channels!"

Gifts from the House of Low Goals.

'If it's a universal remote, how come it doesn't work on the refrigerator?'

'Ah, business as usual.'

How the goat got square eyes.

"Do you want to order in or wither and die?"

Dribbling and snoring - proof that men can multi-task.

'And one and two and let change through and three and four and collapse on the floor.'

Couch Potatoes

'I don't care how comfortable you feel with me. This reels weird for a first date.'

'Don't get up. ... I've got it!'

"This is the way I like it - I pretend to be asleep and he doesn't bother me."

'I load on the job all the time so I figure it's not really 'earned' income.'

'Some blue-arsed fly you turned out to be.'

Inactive wear store.

'I told him we're becoming an endangered species. He just laughed.'