Fitness Comedians Pillows

'Here, hold my dentures.'

Gym Paperboy.

"It's a new work-out video. It shows a mother chasing after three little children all day."

"If we carry them home we’ll get at least one workout."

Bench Press Accident

"Can Johnny come out and eat?"

Keep Fit.

'When the doctor told you to warm up before exercising, I don't think he meant with hot chocolate and hot cross buns.'

Fast Food Dieter

"Our new treadmill is easy to use, you just set it to the speed setting that's most comfortable for you."

Pelobong

Health

T-shirt reads: 'No Pain, No Pain.'

Easy chair exercise machines

"Still on your left."

'Why are jogging on the spot?'

Musclesnakes just swallow the dumbbells.

"Nice try Mrs Wimslow"

Fitness Club Founded in 1892

"What already?! If it weren't for my extraordinary willpower, I'd be exercising right now!"

Jeff was watching his weight.

'He wanted to know if anyone had ever brought out a keep-fat video.'

"Damn speed hump!"

Please seat to be weighted.

'Yeh it's just that I haven't been able to swim on my front,since my boob job.'

"I feel so much more relaxed since I punched out my yoga instructor!"

"Now on the count of three, each of you will turn, aim, and fire, all the while keeping your core engaged.

'...How much did he pay you to sneak in here and take his fitness test?'

'If you can't get me buff can you at least make me cuddly?'

Sit-ups / Stationary-ups

Pontius Pilates

Can't touch my toes without bending my knees, doctor!