Fitness Comedian Pillows

T-shirt reads: 'No Pain, No Pain.'

Man in a gym decides to use a sail on the rowing machine.

Sit-ups / Stationary-ups

"Nice try Mrs Wimslow"

'I want more stamina so I can watch more TV.'

"It's a new diet book. You can't eat until you finish reading a chapter."

"It's a new work-out video. It shows a mother chasing after three little children all day."

"If we carry them home we’ll get at least one workout."

"Can Johnny come out and eat?"

Bench Press Accident

Keep Fit.

'When the doctor told you to warm up before exercising, I don't think he meant with hot chocolate and hot cross buns.'

Fast Food Dieter

Pelobong

Health

"Our new treadmill is easy to use, you just set it to the speed setting that's most comfortable for you."

Pollyanna, the Hamster

Easy chair exercise machines

"Still on your left."

"My doctor told me I should start working out."

Musclesnakes just swallow the dumbbells.

'Why are jogging on the spot?'

Fitness Club Founded in 1892

'Yeh it's just that I haven't been able to swim on my front,since my boob job.'

"What already?! If it weren't for my extraordinary willpower, I'd be exercising right now!"

"Damn speed hump!"

Please seat to be weighted.

Jeff was watching his weight.

'He wanted to know if anyone had ever brought out a keep-fat video.'

"Now on the count of three, each of you will turn, aim, and fire, all the while keeping your core engaged.

"I feel so much more relaxed since I punched out my yoga instructor!"

'...How much did he pay you to sneak in here and take his fitness test?'

'If you can't get me buff can you at least make me cuddly?'

Pontius Pilates

Can't touch my toes without bending my knees, doctor!