Fishy Persuasion Gifts

'He's trying to talk them into giving themselves up!'

"Where's all your fish?" "I never should have bought 'coy' fish."

Kid to fellow fisherman: 'Why do they stink like fish when they've been bathing this whole time?'

Fish talking about fisherman

Man to other about fish on wall: Heh - I use that size fish for bait!'

"Take your first left and then keep turning left until you eventually float to the top."

"Fish needs bigger hole."

'Thanks to a little genetec engineering, we can merchandise these fish right on the farm.'

Fish Food

'I'll have three of those trout, but throw them to me. . . I want to tell the wife I caught them.'

'I wish somebody would say something.'

'There goes the world's largest fish.' (fish bowl)

School of Fish

'Yes we are observing the swordfish boycott, but we brought in special herring with nose jobs.'

Of feeling the balance and whip of a favourite rod.

"It put up a bit of a fight, but hey, I think we can both agree, it was worth it!"

One of the crucial moments in evolution: 'It's a beautiful day today... We could go out for a walk...'

"It is one of life's great mysteries. No one has ever returned to tell."

The way I look at it...give a man a fish and you got a potential customer. Teach a man to fish and you lose market share.

Fisherman.

"Just the bait, please."

'Oh, I would say it was at least twice that size, and it had fangs and horns too...'

'Well, so much for Hennessey. ... But from now on, don't make anyone dribble too close to the piranha tank.'

Revenge of the Fish

"We'll do well here... it's where all the fish who get away go."

'This sounds promising... 'Help wanted: Live Bait'...'

Police officer to conman: 'You're only allowed to keep striped bass.'

"Oh, come on, Mr. Waldner, you knew I was an angler when you hired me."

"No more home swaps on the internet."

"Things hadn't been the same for Binky since the goldfish hired a piranha bodyguard."

'...a little higher and to the right.'

The Submarine and the Fisherman

'You're late for work again, Hayes. What's your lame excuse this time?'

'Thanks for the genetically modified fish food.'