Fiscal Fixer Gifts

"That one's for our numbers."

Office of Management and Budget door is upside down and is closed.

Airline Debts: Layoffs to help us stay afloat.

'Due to the poor response to the roof repair fund we cannot afford to lift the rafters when rejoicing in song.'

'I am willing to concede that the company has been underperforming of late...'

Unable to afford scaffolding, Dave ties plungers on his feet to get up a wall.

Delivering red ink to the Berueu of Management and Budget.

"Thanks to my cost-cutting policies, profits are up 59%."

"I told you we needed deeper foundations!"

"We probably need to rethink our revenue strategy for the practice."

MD - Cosmetic Surgery and Investment Portfolio Makeovers.

'I told him over and over again never to press 'delete' more than twice!'

"Post-holiday dieting will be much easier this year. Our disposable cash flow will be diverted."

"It got so bad that had to bring Jones in to turn things around."

'Let me tell you why I'm here...'

"Well there it is in black and white gentlemen, we're in the red."

Home Business - Printer Ink.

"Now just open wide and relax. Uncle Fred has told me he has a way to fix your braces faster and cheaper than that overpriced orthodontist."

"Get back here and clean out your desk."

"For financial reasons we're selling this brick and mortar home and becoming an online family."

"It's time to break up the company!!"

"With finances the way they are we had to give up the idea of a family holiday this year."

Young Roger Penrose: 'Dad, I want to become a floor tiler.'

'Hello, Biggo Farm Equipment? How much longer is it going to take to get my manure spreader fixed?'

"You've come to the right lawyer. I not only do divorces, I also specialise in bankruptcy proceedings."

'You've done a fine job throwing money at problems, Senator, but I think it's time to bring in a reliever.'

"You were right, dear, slippers, shiny floor and a grouting gun don't mix."

IRS, 'How about that -- 100 unearned income.'

''Getting them by the short and curlies' could be one solution to the financial problem, Mrs...'

Woman at mail boxes which are marked: Local Mail Out - Of Town Mail - Deficit Ideas.

"Good news! The White House has agreed to negotiate with us on that $400 mil in cuts!" "What do you have to give up next time... the other arm or a leg...?"

"The problem with our marriage is that we can't afford marriage counselling."

"You can't dismiss the crushing burden of our national debt just because you don't have kids!"

'Continuing to deficit spend during a budget crunch is what makes America great!'

'My cash flow? It flows right out of my hands to my creditors.'