Festive Lawyer Pillows

'He sees me when I'm sleeping, he knows when I'm awake...'

"Smile if you're guilty!"

'Santa recalled thousands of toys ― he delivered them to kids who're in fact naughty.'

Rudolph goes green (compact flourescent nose)

"A GPS! Thanks guys! It's exactly what I need to guide my sleigh...you know, in light of that unfortunate hunting accident."

Frozen Turkey: "I hate to bother you on a holiday but I'm freezing out here. Do you have a heated enclosed space I could rest inside for four to five hours?"

Happy Holidays from Sanitary Claus!

Frosting the Snowman

"Sorry, Rudolph, but the production on electric reindeers and their batteries gives work to thousands of children while you destroy the climate with your farts."

"We'll see how it goes. It's Santa's first year with the genetically modified deer."

'I'm dreaming of a green Christmas, with every recycled Christmas card I write...'

Classic Emojis for sale.

'Twenty percent bluechips, ten percent small-caps, five percent currency hedges and the remainder in cash. Get that list to Santa right away.'

Dollar Sign Christmas Tree.

'Listen, Santa. Either you repay what you owe, or we reposses Rudolph!'

Then out in the yard, there arose such a grito that I jumped to my feet like a frightened cabrito.

Safe Christmas.

"Santa, snow is falling." "Sell snow!"

Santa using the stock exchange to keep track of stocks and bonds being good or bad as well as going up or down

Governor of the Bank of England outfit

"O Holy night - Aye! The stars are brightly shining - YUH!"

'We had a white Christmas but we'll be in the red until April.'

'No cuts in Medicare!'

'Reindeer must now be fitted with the government approved CZ1 catalytic converter to reduce methane emissions.'

Xmas

'If you expect to get this stuff, you need to work on your ground game.'

'Sorry - I left the naughty kid files on the train.'

Christmas card access

'We'd like to speak with you about your coal policy.'

'First I'd like to remind you of the true meaning of christmas - profits.'

'Hello, Audubon Society - This is Santa, calling in the results of the Northpole's Christmas Bird Count...'

Elf

"Kids on the right, elves on the left."

'We've drunk a Christmas toast to my portfolio, now let's drink a Christmas toast to your portfolio.'

The Bankrupts' Christmas Tree