Festive Filmmaker Pillows

'This could be interesting, quick go and get the video camera!'

Tom Cruise Christmas Impossible

'Santa recalled thousands of toys ― he delivered them to kids who're in fact naughty.'

Mrs. Claus has a ladies night out.

"A GPS! Thanks guys! It's exactly what I need to guide my sleigh...you know, in light of that unfortunate hunting accident."

Happy Holidays from Sanitary Claus!

Frozen Turkey: "I hate to bother you on a holiday but I'm freezing out here. Do you have a heated enclosed space I could rest inside for four to five hours?"

'I'm the ghost of Christmas future. I'm hammered, can we do this later...?'

Christmas Presents.

"We'll see how it goes. It's Santa's first year with the genetically modified deer."

Bad gifts

Classic Emojis for sale.

Snowman has twisted, wonky carrot nose: 'Apparently, it's organic.'

Dollar Sign Christmas Tree.

"Do excuse me, I've got a nuttiness allergy."

Merry Sisyphus - Christmas pudding being pushed up a mountain.

'Listen, Santa. Either you repay what you owe, or we reposses Rudolph!'

Safe Christmas.

'Well, hello, Mr. Christmas!'

"Santa, snow is falling." "Sell snow!"

Your dad is a union man, isn't he?

'No, I'm not writing to Santa, I'm writing a blog questioning the validity of Santa, since he has no web presence.'

Santa hosing the Chimney.

Santa using the stock exchange to keep track of stocks and bonds being good or bad as well as going up or down

'Times are hard so these will have to be presents for Christmas and birthday combined!'

"So Mr. Claus, there is a Virginia!"

T'was the night before Christmas and all through the house not a creature was stirring...except Bert who had a weak bladder!

"O Holy night - Aye! The stars are brightly shining - YUH!"

'We had a white Christmas but we'll be in the red until April.'

C.P.A.

The composer of the 'Twelve Days of Christmas' song.

"Well, if you expect me to be good, you'll have to bring me something better than the rubbish I got last year!"

"We had no sherry so I left him some of your dad's home brew instead."

"Smile if you're guilty!"