Festive Jester Pillows

'That was SO worth it!' - Christmas Tree Toppled

Dec. 26

Rudolph at a Traffic Light

"No, you definitely wouldn't get Christmas Eve off."

'I wasn't in a bar!! I smell like smoke because I've been going down chimneys all flippin' night!'

Santa has a giant tube of chimney lube in his sleigh.

"He said, 'Won't you guide my sleigh tonight?' I thought that meant steer."

'Red trousers and lots of suspicious packages eh? ... Think we've got our man sir! '

NSA is coming to town.

Santa spots stocking hanging up outside mousehole.

Santa getting a Covid Vaccine

'Avoid the Christmas rush, drink now.

U.S Airspace missile detection meets Santa

'That's funny. I'm only allergic to the stuff fake beards are made of.'

'I'm not saying that global warming is a reality...'

Christmas recession...

'Santa, are you in there?'

The Navigator on Christmas Eve

"Mum, I think Grandad's run out of batteries."

Christmas carollers are singing a parody of 'Deck the Halls' . . .

"Sorry kid - you'll shoot your eye out!"

"He wants me to invest in some kind of business idea he says will change the world forever! I don't believe in him!"

"Could you help me fit nine days work into five and still see my family?"

"We all go a bit crackers over Christmas, just try to pull yourself together."

Christmas Newspapers

"Whoa! Looks like a worker's comp thing, Carl."

"Imagine Christmas without inflation."

Night of the Latkes

Pappa clown views offspring in maternity window.

"It's great to see Biff; Socksie the cat is out of the bag..."

Three card brag - I'm great! I'm really handsome & I'm very rich.

Drunk Barber

"Perhaps it wasn't so wise to bring Frosty along!"

"If I survive this holiday, I'm moving to a pond."

"I hate open-mike night."