Festive Funnybone Gifts

'I'm SECRET Santa, kid.'

Snowprov

"I'm the Class Clown fish."

'Well Alice. Now do you know what cull means?'

"This is Siri. No, you're not there yet!"

'Help me, sir... I want to save my last sip of lemonade, but it doesn't work!'

"I just wish that, for once, when he asked me what I wanted, it wasn't followed by 'for Christmas?'"

'Bugger it, we're out of beer!'

'It's going to be hard to get lost in these woods!'

"I can hear Jingle Bells!"

"For Feng Shui I'd like to move your liver above your lungs.''

"Do I have to declare this as income to the IRS?"

Birthdays were always better at Mom's.

We'll pass on the entrees...

'They must be trash fish!'

"Before you go inside, give me a chance to explain the mess ..."

"My child has special wants."

'Re-gifting has become socially acceptable, dear, but re-carding is going a little too far.'

"I am having an alternative Christmas."

'He specializes in chicken dishes.'

Wormio! Wormio! Where for art thou Wormio?

"Welcome to tonight's panel on interfaith humour."

"You planted only beans and corn last year, right Herman...?"

'When the doctor told you to warm up before exercise. I don't thing he meant with hot chocolate and hot cross buns.'

Santa delivering newspapers

Santa, please take a photo of yourself with our presents so I can post it on my Facebook. Thanks! XOXO

Donut Eating Contest

Breakthrough by a comic

Phone call from heaven.

"Shut the door! Do you live in a barn or something?!"

'Sorry, we're looking for a short order cook.'

"The starfish doesn't want to stay on top of our Christmas tree!"

Getting Religion Back Into Christmas.

Bibles r us.

Tire Store. Blowout Sale!