Festive Forensic Fan Pillows

'You know who's been naughty and who's been nice? -- you're not using DNA evidence, are you?'

"It's not a party until someone gets plowed."

"Christmas drinks 'n' nibbles system"

Peephole in a pile of presents (colour).

'Looks like someone beat us to the punch.'

Christmas tree with wadded up lights.

Cut out and keep your own Christmas Caterer.

"You can't prove that I broke it! Where's your physical evidence? Fingerprints or a DNA profile?"

'I was an egg in the Easter play.'

Mrs Claus - North Pole Dancing.

'Do I get to take an 'elfie' with Santa, too?'

"I love these old decorations!"

"Sir, you're not on the list - we've checked it twice."

I understand that our cat Magus died. I miss her a lot. But I wish my parents wouldn't tiptoe around it. House of Java.net Cybercafe. You don't have to watch Youtube clips of CSI: Miami to understand that death is a part of life. The thing I don't understand about our cat's death is, who would've killed her and left a mountain of unresolved clues that only a crack forensics team can figure out? Where were you at 8:45 p.m.? The Youtube Generation grows up fast.

Yo ho ho!

Meet Santa's entourage

"Hmm. The lights are on, but nobody's home..."

"My pawprints? Nah, I wore gloves. They matched my noseprints on the window."

"If I survive this holiday, I'm moving to a pond."

'Thanks mum, it's just what I always wanted!'

Christmas sweater alternatives

"I've had. . . um. . . just a small sherry. . ."

"As you can see, I've learned the alphabet."

'And that,and that,and that...'

I understand that our cat Magus died. I miss her a lot. But I wish my parents wouldn't tiptoe around it. House of Java.net Cybercafe. You don't have to watch Youtube clips of "CSI: Miami" to understand that death is a part of life. The thing I don't understand about our cat's death is, who would've killed her and left a mountain of unresolved clues that only a crack forensics team can figure out? Where were you at 8:45pm? The Youtube generation grows up fast.

A Christmas tree self portrait

The other days of the year...

Merry Kissmas

"... and I would have gotten away with it if it weren’t for you meddling forensic pathologists."

'Let's open presents Christmas Eve AND morning. That way Christmas lasts for TWO days.'

'I agreed to guide you, My contract says nothing about pulling a sleigh,'

Back to the Holidays

Are we human or are we Dancer, Prancer, Comet and Vixen

"Pull over, Rudolph! We'll have to charge the electric sleigh again..."

'First she called my mother, and then she called Santa.'