Festive Family Conflict Navigator Gifts

"You're a veteran? In which wars did you serve?"

"Wheeeeeeee!"

'How do you know I won't shrink if I didn't come with a washing instructions tag?'

"This might take awhile, Lord."

"I'm taking 'moving back in with the parents' studies."

'sugar and spice my eye.'

'It may not be your feng shui, but it's my feng shui.'

"'Parent' should always be an action verb."

"Do we want to tackle this head on, or just stun it with a glancing blow until Monday?"

'I'll fix the problem... you fix the blame.'

'I take it this department has had conflicts.'

Then out in the yard, there arose such a grito that I jumped to my feet like a frightened cabrito.

"We've given it a great deal of thought and we decided we're going to give in to everything you want at all times."

"What a cute little spot for us to eventually get into a fight in!"

'Busting balls since 1983.'

'We're facing a hostile takeover.'

'I think the problem is, Lydia, you're a man-hater and Robert, you're a woman-hater, and I can't stand either one of you.'

"Sergio, I think you've done a great job raising the children."

The Big Tree

'How come I never see you in church?'

Santa in 'A Christmas Box'

"This baby will hold more than a hundred and twenty-five cubic feet of family rancor."

Reason #149 for making sure the whole family wears seat belts: It helps keep the kids quiet.

"If you're not a good boy, Santa will bring you only educational toys."

"Will you turn that TV down? Can't you see I'm on the phone?"

'When the going gets tough, the tough SUE.'

"Thanks for the super pirate ship, Mum."

Coping during the 6 weeks school holidays.

Governor of the Bank of England outfit

"True, you have irreconcilable differences, but they're mainly about flossing."

"I'm sorry, Tom... but you don't Chronic Fatigue Syndrome if it only when you're going to see your inlaws."

"No, we're not there yet because your father refuses to ask for directions!"