Festive Dinner Hosts Gifts

"After our big family holiday dinners, we always have some leftovers."

Grace For Flies

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

'..and we thank thee for these bio-engineered vegetables..'

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

"Oh, boy, hard-core sugar!"

#Thanksgiving #Nofilter

'On the contrary... I'm too tough for the steak!'

"Rump roast?"

"I'm afraid the challah got a little burnt this week."

Frozen Turkey: "I hate to bother you on a holiday but I'm freezing out here. Do you have a heated enclosed space I could rest inside for four to five hours?"

Hamish Harris. The boy bon vivant.

Party time.

"Again, are you sure I didn't mention about bringing your own 3-D glasses?"

"Darling, wait until you taste the new year's menu I have ordered for us!"

Horn of Leftovers

"Gesundheit!"

'Thank you so much, but I just followed the directions in the cookbook.'

'Would you like you steak WITH or WITHOUT a capella?'

"I don’t know, Margaret. She looks like the type who makes exotic stuffings."

'I'm thankful you didn't make turnips.'

"Oh, it's alright. You couldn't know that I'm honey-intolerant."

'Giles is a surgeon who likes to bring his work home with him.'

A little sharpener before dinner, darling?

"When it comes to turkeys, Mom, you sure know your stuff-ing."

"Yes, he is a celebrity chef, but he doesn't have any opinions on Iraq."

'I said, I don't know about you, but I'm a bit disappointed in the strolling musician.'

"A little lamb please."

Peas on Earth.

"This meal tastes just like dog crap!"

"Let that breathe a little. But not too much. My last bottle hyperventilated."

'This soufle is hard.' - 'No it isn't, your teeth are soft.'

"Here's to a great post-meal nap."

'I'm in the mood to cook!'

'This year, I thought I'd try a self-basting turkey!'