Festival Aficionado Gifts

'I love it when it's sunny at festivals. It makes the mud so much warmer.'

Happy Hanukkah Cats

Happy Cinco De Mayo!

"I should be on the list. I'm an emerging author with unique cultural views."

Dog Owner.

'What d'you mean, I never take you anywhere - who took you to the Festival of Britain?'

Just in case its sunny.

Merry Chrismoose!

International Carrot Day April 4th

Glastonbury. After.

Mardi Gras

'Nothing beats seeing your favourite band play live.'

Face painting.

"I'll do the movie but I want to be highly compensated and highly acclaimed."

"Hey grandpa, tell us more about the time you were in that Steven Spielberg movie."

Southwark Fair.

"After the show, I'll be autographing any computer or phone screens where my albums are streamed."

"Oh, we're not religious. We only go on the solstices and equinoxes."

"10th Anniversary Woodstock Reunion'

"Seth, here, is one of the best young creative compromisers in the business."

"Bloody hell!"

"Same story every morning - 'Can you come and fix our windmill?'..."

Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup? A scene from an Esther Williams movie.

Reese Witherspoon

What's In Her Bag? Coachella Edition!

The Selfie

Kritik's Korner

Canadian film production

"Really! How many 'How to Survive the Festive Season' articles does one man need?"

"We need to make it through at least one movie, so we have something to root for during the Oscars."

"Of course they're permanent. I'm an artist."

Moby Dick

'Action!...Cut!...Right, everything else is CGI'

"Do you think there's ANY possibility that the 76 pints of lager,13 bottles of wine and 12 kilos of chocolate you've had MAY have contributed to you feeling 'a bit under the weather'?"

"You can tell it's a period drama because they're not wearing ozone helmets."