Ferrets Gifts

'Hey, Mom - I hope you're sitting down, because you just got another grandferret!'

"Wise up. You and me do not make a ferret craze."

"He was a dog person, I was a cat person, the answer was a ferret."

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

It is important to give your dog opportunities to play with people.

"Bark or stare? Always a tough decision. Bark? Maybe stare? Whimper? Maybe? Meanwhile, stare."

Playing Fetch.

"Hulk no can be mad at Mr. Puppy Face"

"I can't believe how great my life is now: We used to live in an apartment, but now, I have my own garden..."

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

"Fish needs a bigger bowl."

"Did I hear the dog in here?"

Police Feline Unit

"Better bring me another cookie. The last one fell in the water."

"Pick me!"

'I'd say he's 10 percent 'pet' and 90 percent 'Lord and Master of All He Surveys'.'

'...I already have 26 cats, why not 27...'

"Think of it as twenty one in human years. I'll take a bourbon and toilet water."

"He's got no clue how easy he has it compared to his ancestors."

Knock on the door - dog stands up and shouts 'Beat it!'

'Someone got me because I matched her purse, I've been to a rock concert, a night club and two weddings, Life as a designer dog is great but I'd trade caviar for kibble to get a good night's sleep,'

'So far, I've taught him to fetch.'

"Actually, make that a double cream."

Indoor Climbing Centre for Cats.

"I'm expert at sniffing out blame."

A crowd of happy pet owners.

Randall couldn't wait to see what else the 'Magic Trash Can' could make disappear.

'I know you're really proud, dear. But, don't you think people might think you're bragging?'

"Why do they do that?"

'With 73 dog obedience books read between us, I think we must consider defeat.'

'Joe took the day off to go to the ball game. So I'll be sitting in for him until he gets back. Would you like me to fetch you something?'

"Let me just check my email, my texts, my missed calls, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, WhatsApp, my credit score, my horoscope, the results of this latest personality test, the S. & P., the Dow, the news, this article about cute dogs, and the weather, and then we can go."

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

Cat woman shopping for cats.

"He was overly socialized as a puppy."