Fence Philosophers Gifts

“It’s not working because you’re on the wrong side of the fence – look, I’m pulling and it’s not working. I can’t believe you don’t see this …”

A vegetarian cursing a cow.

"The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence."

"It turns out crows find a bunch of dead crows more frightening than a man made out of hay."

'Think how all that chatting is affecting global warming.'

"When you've lost fifteen pounds...that's when the refrigerator gets returned!"

Courage. Love.

''Food miles' is a big issue, so I'm reducing the distance my food travels by moving my fridge into the living room.'

'I'm afraid I'll fall and no one will hear me.'

Deer against capital punishment about to be shot.

You can't get what up

Meekness of Mr Pecksniff and his Charming Daughter

Tortured Plank

"I always know what Harry's going to say, and he always knows what I'm going to say, so, by and large, we just don't bother."

'Dog got your clog?'

Grass: We lost some good men today!

"Don't worry, Jules. It'll come up on your side of the house in just 12 hours."

"What do you mean, we don't have an 'exit strategy'?!"

My definition of 'quality time?'...charging $500 per hour.

"What should I say this is about?"

"You forgot to adjust your hilling discs again, didn't you?"

Dept. de Philosophie

"Mr. Coughlin over there was the founder of one of the first motorcycle gangs"

"Why can't they call it a 'Deer' or a 'Squirrel' market?"

"In the Wild Wild West, we say, if it isn't yours, DON'T TAKE IT..."

"I'm sorry your girlfriend left you, Frank...but you must concentrate on the job!"

'I don't feel at home on the range any more!'

"Am I rusting? I think one of my sections is sinking. Oh, no! I thought I heard the gate squeak."

"...umm, when was the last time somebody cleaned the fridge?!"

Art Museum vs Refrigerator Artwork

'I hear your fees are very reasonable.'

"You're wasting your time, Dad. I learned in day care a cow jumped over the moon."

'Nothing to do? Why don't you read the refrigerator.'

'I'd give anything to be able to sit down.'

"Forty years ago on this very seat I proposed to you. Made up your mind yet?"