Feline Companions Gifts

'Was that real purring?'

'Personally, I don't like to play Fetch, but it makes him happy.'

"See? I told you changing his food would be traumatizing."

"Foster failure"

"What you call tricks I call humiliations."

'When he's happy he can cool the entire downstairs.'

"They think we're their best friend. Just play along with it."

"...and someone with no fleas. Anything else?"

How Nature Senses a Change in the Weather

'Yessir, Ben us fly fisherman answer to a higher calling.'

"You were right: I don't like water, but I do love snow!"

"Oh no, after you. I insist!"

"And where have you previously moused?"

'Cat or dog?' - 'A little of both.'

"Is this any way to treat 'Man's best friend'?"

'He's a superior breed - He always drinks thru' a straw!'

"Hon, come quick! Mr. Puff has lowered his impenetrable wall of feline indifference, and it probably won't last long!"

"And for lot 27 we have another old tennis ball."

'He barks when he sees the boss coming.'

"We're just going to have to face the fact that you're not a puppy anymore!"

'You can't be serious! They wash you by dipping you in a tub of water! That's horrible!'

Hush puppy.

Tell me again how aloof and independent cats are.

"Blow out the candles!" "Make a wish!" "I wish I had my testicles back."

"Oh, yeah, that's the spot... just stay there... hurt so good... a little harder—yes! You are my hero, no kidding, I freaking love y-oooh..."

"Oh well, I guess I'm lucky that he's not a duck hunter."

"I can't wait for vacation - I'm going to go sun myself in a south-facing window."

A man and his dog

"I'm working from home today."

'Tiddles has left everything to an old folks' home.'

"I know we've had our differences in the past but if you scratch behind my ears I'll show you where the catnip is kept."

'The meaning of life is dog food.'

"They're friendly, but they're also carnivorous, so remember that when you're called on to beg and roll over."

"You understand that they call you 'good boy' because they can't remember your name, right? They never forget my name, they care about me..."

'It's normal, don't worry, people on the street just love patting puppies...'