Fashion Statement Seekers T-Shirts

"They looked really cool when we tried them on in the store, right?"

'Something for the weekend, Sir?'

'Now that I've lost weight, I can't afford new clothes in my size.'

"Yes, they're hair extensions, but you have to agree, I look fabulous..."

Two women wearing identical dresses head toward exchange window at department store.

"Can you make wishes on fake eyelashes?"

"Oh to be young and in love and wear things cut on the bias."

'Awright...Who's the dirty, lowdown varmint who's copyin' my plaid-shirt-and-stone-wash-jeans-with-matching-boots-and-vest ensemble?'

"If the economy's ground to a halt, we can help by carrying on shopping."

"And now. . . which shoes?"

"I can never get my sunglasses on my head the way my hairdresser does"

"He thought he'd stand out more in a body suit."

'These fit just right. Do you have anything too tight?'

Pampered and poodled.

Life Store Guide: Make-up and jewellery

"Are you looking to accentuate or camouflage?"

'Sure I'm late. . . I not only have to get ready for school. . . now I have to get ready in case some idiot takes my picture for YouTube.'

'They've certainly got designs on your purse!'

Goldilocks and the seventeen black shoulder bags

Mister Pretty Shoes

"Let's try for dignified yet playful, while maintaining the spirit of preservation."

"I don't like your application."

"Do you do much walking?"

"Some fitting room. Nothing fits!"

"I feel there's a whole culture around mules."

"It's really quite simple: Shave off the soul patch and the car is yours."

"You won't believe this but I haven't a thing to wear"

'No way Doug! You can not stick it to the man in new season, smart casual menswear!'

'I'll take it!'

Elegant woman in backless dress.

A member of a very populous consumer group attempts to go shopping...

"The suit - it's rejecting your body."

Changing Room Decisions

"Of course, lots of women are just going bare-headed."

Born to be Mild.