Fashion Reformer Gifts

'Post-maternity wear.'

If you bathe a skunk in tomato juice, it will smell like a dog. A bird in the hand is better than two in your shorts. Never wear aqua after Thanksgiving. Unconventional wisdom.

Woman's Support Group: No Bra, No Griddle, No Service.

'You did turn the company around... but we liked it the way it was...'

"I just hope the world doesn't end before people can see our outfits."

'At least we look cool. Especially with the wind chill factor.'

"Breathe in and reimagine yourself in a world where you lived a healthy lifestyle."

'What are the other nonconformists wearing this year?'

"By 'dress down day', most of us mean not wearing a jacket!"

"He'll never grow out of it. It's made of rubber."

Rock and Roll

"Amazing! It's the season of me!"

"Aren't we going a little overboard with Friday's casual dress code!?"

'More hair than brains.'

Man burning his tie.

Punkins

Speedo Limit: 21 Years

"It makes a statement, but it begs a question."

'Good luck with the presentation dear and I still think it would be better without the hat!'

"I'm having second thoughts about those damn school uniforms."

"You want to grow a ponytail? OK...as long as it's not from hair growing out of your ears."

'Casual Friday's never caught on in this department.'

How Fashion Works - 'You obviously haven't heard - the adults are wearing them narrow now,'

"I'm outside the fancy dress shop...."

"Fashion Week"

Vacancies in Customer Care - Up Yours

"...and if we need someone with an earrings, I'll be in touch."

'Does anyone have a question?'

Chippunks

'You are the first and the last of the Mohicans ... out!'

Personnel Manager to applicant: 'Your resume and references are excellent, but your hair is too silly.'

'He always said he wouldn't be seen dead with his shirt outside his trousers - he'll be livid.'

"Nice. Got this in camo?"

Tattoo and Piercing...Stares by an angry, judgmental mother.

"No this is timeless classic menswear appreciation. Hipster beatnik is Tuesday nights."