Fashion Forward Dreamer Gifts

"This year it's all about comfort."

The fate of the emigrant

In the future, human thought will enter an age of clarity and purity never before dreamed of.

'Now that I've lost weight, I can't afford new clothes in my size.'

'At least we look cool. Especially with the wind chill factor.'

Scot to a Greek: 'Love your outfit.'

Standard endings for sci-fi movies...

"But everyone else gets to market their own personal scent!"

"So what's this special distracting tactic you've developed?"

"You're fortunate. Stubble looks really good on you."

"Amazing! It's the season of me!"

'I told him not to wear stretchy pants to dinner.'

"The suit - it's rejecting your body."

Dress for Success suit shop: 'Can I pay you for it later, after I get successful?'

'Which fashion magazine do you recommend?'

"Overkill, dude."

Christmas sweater alternatives

Standardisation: "I don't understand...it fitted us OK!"

Danae's Celebrity Career: 'I don't know where to begin in deciding what I want to be when I grow up...I want people to shut and leave me alone, and I need lots of attention, so...'

A word from James Cameron. . .

Beware of Dawg.

Son, you'll never be quick on the draw unless you pull your dang pants up.

'Look at him with another business model on his arm.'

"'How to Buy Tickets on Bezos' Spaceship so You Can Live to See Your Teens,' by Chloe Butler."

'In the future, that should produce thousands of PhD theses.'

"I'm never ready for sweater weather."

Minion, I'm ordering you not to talk about alternate histories with the customers. No more "what if feudalism never happened" nonsense. If people start thinking things could've been different, they'll soon start thinking things could've been better. Which could lead to them thinking things can still get better. This "gap between rich and poor" thing is working out in my favor. I don't want your talk of alternate pasts to accidentally create any alternate futures. Very bad man.

'...but since no fossils of dinosaur clothing have yet been found, what you see here is mostly speculation.'

"Someday our robots will have all our anxieties for us."

'You've had the eye exam. Now buy the t-shirt!'

"Man, how to you guys get that great new flying saucer smell in here?!'

Chippunks

"Late Jurassic is so Retro..."

Social Struggles

A Wolf in Sheep's Clothing.