Fashion-forward Innovator Gifts

"This is going to make the most amazing driftwood table."

'I'll be darned! A nipple mood ring!'

'At least we look cool. Especially with the wind chill factor.'

Old hippie gives peace sign.

"Wow, these slippers are really warm!"

'Ouwth! Bid my tong!'

'She dressed herself this morning.'

"I feel there's a whole culture around mules."

"Amazing! It's the season of me!"

"Like my new haircut?"

'...so I simply combined my love of beards with my love of tattoos and this was the result!'

'This was designed for people who have mastered easy chairs and want to attempt something more difficult.'

Do you like my bling?

"When a cowboy wears it, it is a cowboy hat."

Social Struggles

"It's expensive because it connects to the internet."

"Late Jurassic is so Retro..."

"Nice. Got this in camo?"

'...but since no fossils of dinosaur clothing have yet been found, what you see here is mostly speculation.'

Caveman applying wallpaper cave paintings

'He doesn't seem to like my haircut.'

"Anyone who laughs at my new haircut will be subjected to immediate termination."

Chippunks

A Wolf in Sheep's Clothing.

"It's off the rack. The guy on the rack doesn't need it anymore."

'Now don't complain Mum: You started it by giving me my first nose-ring...'

Snake Dress-Up

'Welcome home, dear. While you were away I redecorated...'

"Just think, someday we'll be considered 'retro'."

"I want you to work late. Put on your overtime shoes."

"Would you believe I can still fit into my tux after eighteen years?"

"How much more for pinstripes?"

'I ran into a whittler.'

A Revolution In Formal Wear! The Cummertie in Four Classic Styles!

"Hold on a minute, will you? I just want to see what color Charlie Rose's tie is tonight."