Farming Enthusiast Gifts

'This is gonna sound crazy, but I've got an idea.'

"My platform can be summarized in a single word: Leadership!"

'It worked! Dressing the scarecrow like a lawyer has scared everybody away!'

"...and here I was...only just getting used to being paid for NOT doing things."

'Of course the Smiths have more than we do. His wife works.'

Johnny Cash Cow: 'I've got some great seats at the back.'

Bird seed.

'If I'm learning the farming business inside out,can I learn it on the inside today?'

"Grandpa, if I ever decide to get involved in farming, it will be strictly as a commodities broker."

"...and Lord, we thank You for blessing Farmer Finkel with an abundant bean harvest...and thus our new pews."

'Look out, here comes that scarey farmer.'

'uh oh, we'd better run for it: There's a combine-harvester coming this way...'

Tobacco leaf care

"It drives me MAD when farmers complain about their work. . . I mean they do valuable important, interesting and rewarding work. . . and they get to do it 90 hours a week!"

2019 Floods in U.S.

"The more successful I become the less money I make."

"I guess it must be that new growth hormone the farmer gave me!"

Farmer's credit.

'Because he was the one who had to milk her. That's why Jack traded the cow for a handful of beans.'

"No need to be embarrassed. Eventually we all need a lanolin supplement."

'Dad, if God rested on the seventh day, who milked the cows?'

The cow that didn't succeed in jumping over the Moon.

Sheep dreaming of man jumping over fence

"My great uncle produced a lot of ethanol but he couldn't sell it legally."

The Desk that Broke the Plains.

'Aha! Here's the trouble! It's Macracanthorhychus hirudinaceus!'

At least he could say that he straightened the prongs of the fork today.

'Hello boss, I was just thinking about you.'

'You realise of course, we could be carriers of foot and mouth!'

'Man, oh man! I shoulda brought my fishin' gear!'

"How is it that seed prices can go up but wholesale prices can stay flat when the seeds come from the plants?"

"'Nother load of tobacco money headin' north, Ma." "Yep."

"The good old days of eating the washing off the line are all gone methinks: The farmer has bought an electric dryer..."

'Keep me informed of the herds' mood.'

'Little Yank' Calf Puller.