Farm Fairy Tale Fan Gifts

"Only once! That particular winter morning, it has snowed overnight and the sunrise was so spectacular I was speechless: I forgot to cock-a-doodle-do!"

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

Bird feeding chick that is nesting in a knight's helmet

Igor hesitated - "You give me that silly old brain, and i'll give you these magic beans!"

"Why didn't one of the bears just call 9-1-1 and have that girl arrested for trespassing?"

'You were right Doc: Jumping over the monn did boost my self esteem!'

Chicken Little was correct about something falling, unfortunately, it was an axe, and not the sky.

'You're doing a play in kindergarten?'

'You were great at 'Daniel in the Lion's Den!' -- I'd sure like to hear you do 'The Three Little Pigs' sometime!'

'I'm retiring soon and looking for something more comfortable...like a loafer.'

'Of course it's safe. It has no preservatives, no additives, no artificial coloring...'

'Don't touch that tooth, dad. I'm expecting the tooth fairy at any moment.'

'I suppose you think that's funny.'

'It was romantic before we had kids. Build some stairs.'

'...and I only have eyes, for ewe...'

"Rapunzel's gone punk."

"If she thinks I'm just gonna come running on home, wagging my tail behind me..."

"This isn't the big city anymore, Jim. I'm the facilitator now."

Bathroom Fairy

Once upon a time and a half. Buick and the Beast.

Storm in a magic lamp.

'What can you wish for?!... Oh, I don't know... Infinite wealth, beautiful women throwing themselves at your feet, fame and admiration, perhaps?... But, don't let me influence you.'

"Don't worry your majesty, they can't see you, this is a one way mirror."

'The roof needs icing.'

'He said he won't give me a new heart unless I change my lifestyle.'

"At a certain point, I bring them back."

Bedtime story.

"Mirror, mirror on the wall ... what the heck is up with my hair?"

"Mirror, mirror on the wall, what is up with my hair?!"

'Once upon a time there was a really lousy editor name Sue. Sue was lazy and stupid, so she was fired, and her boss lived happily ever after. The end.'

"I know you're a cow, but you're still hogging the covers!"

'My name is Mrs. Horner. My son Jackie stuck his thumb into a hot pie and burned it.'

Goldie Locks and the three beers.

'I'm sorry but my little boy, Jack, ruined them all today.'

"Don't worry, princess, I'm sure one day your Mr. Divine Right will come along."