Fantasy Story Collector Gifts

Home Sweet Home

'I met my wife in unfortunate circumstances. I was single.'

'If I told you what I wished for, you'd probably slap me.'

Now that you have a heart, you really should switch to polyunsaturated oil.

"Do you live nearby by any chance? I hate to eat in public."

'MUM, go and get Daddy, there's another knight coming: This is so much fun!'

"Define fair."

7 More Dwarfs

"What do you mean you're tired of AB negative?"

"No, I don't think you 'new break shoes', I think you need new break feet. You are supposed to depress the brake pedal you know."

"Love your ambiance!"

"I've finished the press statement about the kraken."

''Masterpiece Theater' will not be seen tonight, so that we may bring you 'Slushpile Showplace'....'

"I hate to spoil your porridge, but your son has a blonde in his room."

Who's Dead

'I'm the good witch, and this is my house - made entirely out of dental care products.'

Well, I didn't know he was a dragon when I met him online!

"I've seen a lot in my time, Ted, but it was always from the cheap seats."

Master Humphrey's visionary friends

A headless man puts up a poster for his lost head.

"We met through a contact tracing app."

'You've become a right pain in the neck.'

'Good afternoon madam, we're Federal Bear Investigators. We believe a miss Goldilocks lives here?'

A frog catches an insect truck.

"Grandpa! You have to let me put those under my pillow!"

A Ghost

Excess Baggage: As soon as you pick a vacation destination, people who have never been there start to tell you horror stories about the place.

'Yes, he did turn into a price, but there were complications.'

'Warp nine - Engage!'

Alice Through the Looking Glass - Alice and the Red Queen.

Lost property

Floods leave man and ghost stranded.

"Gentlemen, this is Mr. Griscom, Super Films' new horror expert."

Elf Farm

Prompts on the Antiques Roadshow.