Fantasy Cuisine Fan T-Shirts

'He's trying to put some magic into my recipes.'

"The menu just says fried fish, but may I give you a more compelling, surprisingly lyrical description?"

Counting ribs

'It's the chef's special. His wife just had a baby.'

'Why, of course I remember our first date -- I had filet mignon, potatoes au gratin, sauteed....'

Self Service Restaurant: 'Where do you keep the eggs?'

'Now that's what I call a kebab... a skewer with whole pies!'

'He doesn't ask for a menu... he asks for an estimate!'

Kitchen Kapers

"I forgot to take a pic of the tacos."

"This is our soft opening."

"And then, when I feel like a rum punch and breaded shrimp, I can just swim to Tony’s Trattoria."

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

Elfian lady grilling on mushroom: 'Summertime in the Enchanted Forest'.

Benihana style of cooking.

"I thought there would be bacon here."

"Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell Thursday's gluten-free lasagna!"

Important Food Groups

The Streets - Night

"Spoiler alert! If you read the specials, you'll find out the Chef's Surprise!"

Burnt or Raw?

Would you be willing to sign something regarding the fat content of your burger? Like what? My colon.

Kiddies Menu for Witches

The candy house, if the tale of Hansel and Gretel would happen today.

CAUTION: Creative genius at work

"We add an eighteen percent gratuity for parties of six or more."

'You want to eat out tonight? -- What if we get addicted to good food?'

"Just a pinch, Helga ... spicy eye of newt doesn't agree with me."

"Nice try, Mom, but I'm going to go with a caterer."

'Shall we turn the extractor fan down a bit...?'

"As you can guess, Rico is my role model."

North Fork, the town too tough to diet.

"Oh, but we could be so good together...!"

"Is the garbage fresh?"

"Can you reinvent the classic grilled cheese for me?"