Fans Of Holiday Humor Pillows

'Don't worry about it -- we all have naughty thoughts now and then.'

"Damn. I think I missed the turn for Bethlehem."

Mrs. Claus has a ladies night out.

'You and your 'Rescue the Reindeer' campaign!'

Piranhaclaus

Elfie Stick

Happy Holidays from Sanitary Claus!

"I prefer to talk to Mrs. Claus. She doesn't care if I'm naughty or nice."

"Why would I want to meet Santa? I can just go home and log onto his social media page from the comfort of my bed."

Try me/try me/try me...

Evil elves trying to take advantage of Christmas tree fairies.

"I can't imagine why we didn't think of this before."

"How could we be short? You had enough chocolate for everyone on our list!"

'Dang, again we're going so fast that we caused a disruption in the time-space continuum.'

'I'm the ghost of Christmas future. I'm hammered, can we do this later...?'

"I think I preferred it before he became an equal-opportunity employer."

"I could get used to working remotely."

'He's got your nose.'

"We can do this the easy way or we can do it the hard way ..."

Stonehenge Sandcastle

'No sharing gifts! You get the Teddy Bear, he gets the bone.'

Father Christmas Painting Robins.

“He’s timid, very shy. I rescued him from some wacko who tried to steal Christmas.”

Browned off cows. They can't pull a cracker.

"All it will do is move crime to the South Pole."

"Then you just run a VLOOKUP against the Naughty column."

'We can always cook it one half at a time.'

Santa's Helpers

'Our trip to Florida was great until Rob took us driving with the dolphins.'

"I noticed a few browns."

"Gesundheit!"

'Let's skip Mr. Arnold's house. He's the dog catcher.'

"Could you help me fit nine days work into five and still see my family?"