Holiday Humor Aficionados Pillows

Carol singers at Anagram Company singing 'Listen Thing' instead of 'Silent Night'.

Piranhaclaus

"Your behavior was kind of shady so don't be surprised if you only receive clothes for Christmas."

"What do I want? You're telling me you haven't seen my public wish list on Amazon?"

"Why would I want to meet Santa? I can just go home and log onto his social media page from the comfort of my bed."

"Damn. I think I missed the turn for Bethlehem."

Mrs. Claus has a ladies night out.

'You and your 'Rescue the Reindeer' campaign!'

Mighty Man Of Justice Goes Christmas Shopping Part 1

Elfie Stick

Happy Holidays from Sanitary Claus!

"I prefer to talk to Mrs. Claus. She doesn't care if I'm naughty or nice."

'Dang, again we're going so fast that we caused a disruption in the time-space continuum.'

Evil elves trying to take advantage of Christmas tree fairies.

"How could we be short? You had enough chocolate for everyone on our list!"

"I can't imagine why we didn't think of this before."

"I always forget how much louder they sound in the country."

"I think I preferred it before he became an equal-opportunity employer."

"I could get used to working remotely."

How to spot the infrequent Mass attendees.

“He’s timid, very shy. I rescued him from some wacko who tried to steal Christmas.”

Browned off cows. They can't pull a cracker.

Father Christmas Painting Robins.

'No sharing gifts! You get the Teddy Bear, he gets the bone.'

Stonehenge Sandcastle

"We can do this the easy way or we can do it the hard way ..."

"All it will do is move crime to the South Pole."

Santa's Helpers

You Will Have a Merry Christmas. . . Resistance is Futile.

'Kids like my presents, but do they really like me?'

"Could you help me fit nine days work into five and still see my family?"

'We can always cook it one half at a time.'

Christmas on Other Planets.

"Then you just run a VLOOKUP against the Naughty column."

"Gesundheit!"